Just a quick update on my PhD journey. I passed my compre last November. Barely. I presented my proposal last week. I need to revise it. Add a lot more of preliminary concepts. I don't even know where to start.
I also have a paper to write. And I hit a snag. The Lie algebra that I'm studying has a lot more elements than I thought. The results are still valid but describing them is a lot more difficult now. It's a nice problem to have though. It has become more interesting.
My adviser has asked me if I celebrated after my proposal. I actually didn't. I rested for a couple of days so I guess that counts as "celebration". And now I'm on my period so I can't work as much because of cramps. I haven't gotten out of the house either. I plan to after my period is over.
I don't know what to make of this discontent. I'm actually ahead of schedule. But the expectations are so high it feels like I'm lagging behind. Feeling grateful is not automatic.
I realize I'm learning a lot more now. Things that used to be difficult are easier now. But some things are still hard. I'll figure it out eventually.
I'm writing this post to remind myself that I'm lucky. Yes, I worked hard for them but there's still an element of luck in it. I actually manifested my research topic somewhat. It's crazy.
Words are indeed powerful.
Why am I bothered by Laggies ? So much so that I don’t like finishing it? I guess the main character is about to make wrong decisions. And that gives me anxiety. I’m screaming at the screen, “No! Don’t do that”. But of course, they still do. Of course. I already know how this is gonna end. Why does it bother me so much when technically she’s not doing anything wrong? Oh yes, she’s gonna hurt her fiance when she inevitably breaks off their engagement. And? I don’t know. As I said, I don’t like it when characters make wrong decisions. She’s running away because she discovered that her father is having an affair. And instead of confronting him, she’s living with a teenager and her dad. And of course, she’s gonna fall in love with the dad. Predictable. I guess I just don’t like it when I don’t have control over things. The question is: will my worrying ever change the outcome? No. Definitely not. It’s all predetermined. But why am I worried on behalf of the main character? Even if she...
Comments
Post a Comment